The Pretentious Illiterate

Halloj alla,

Jag tänkte fuska lite och bara klistra in det jag skrivit på http://bellisplace.blogspot.com/ . Jag blev bara så fasligt nöjd med det här inlägget. Och det är ju så mycket lättare att skriva på engelska. Känns mer naturligt på nåt vis. Inte så pretentiöst. Aja, here goes...

Just as I'm about to start writing my elbow starts to hurt =/ Highly uncomfortable. And painful. And whilst we're still on the subject of pain and discomfort I have to mention that the contents of my stomach want out, desperately. Sorry, I just had to mention that. I feel like crap, physically. Mentally I'm on top of the world.
Today, some long awaited rain fell and made it bearable to be outside. It was horrible right before the rain, the humidity went up and the pressure was on. Though I stayed at home all day and watched Family Guy, couldn't stand the heat outside. I also did some tests on OkCupid. Designed as some sort of datingsite, but I'm there simply because the tests and results intrigue me.
I was out for a short walk and it was absolutely wonderful outside. Now that the rain and the night have fallen. It's really wonderful. Like walking in a dream. It's perfect. And you just feel alive. And you realize that all this is for real, that you are real and suddenly everything makes sense. It all seems so... real. And beautiful, purposeful. I'm not even sure that's a word. If not, it should be.
I'm just happy I got a moment of reality. A moment of clarity and purpose. Just enough to get me back on track and off the damn depression- wagon. A moment to get back to reality and myself. A brief moment to realize that life isn't just giving me a bunch of lemons. As a matter of fact I haven't gotten lemons in quite a while, but the last ones left a long aftertaste. A sour taste in my mouth and a bitter mind. But I got to clear my head tonight and I'm very pleased that I did. It gave me a new perspective on my life and I'll try to use this gift as much as possible now, before it fades. I need to find out what I want out of life, or at least what I want to accomplish these coming 10 years or so.
Because time runs out way to fast, and I don't want to be like Madame du Barry (Louis XV's mistress who got decapitated/beheaded on the 8th of December, 1793). I don't want my last words to be: "Encore un petit moment, monsieur le Bourreau." (Just one moment longer, Mr Executioner).
Bell